It's the last week of school. How can that be? It doesn't feel like the last week of school, with the electric energy pulsing through the hallways. My Zoom class attendance has plummeted, even on the last meetings of the class. Tomorrow I say goodbye to my 8th graders on Zoom. It feels so impersonal. I'm working on their "words," and I just can't even imagine how it will feel. I always give them their word with a hug. Now, even if we were together, I couldn't get close enough to touch them. My love language is touch... both giving and receiving. Quarantine is rough on those of us with the love language of touch. Yikes. I'm so glad I have Andrew, or I'd really be in a bad place.
Speaking of being in a bad place, does anyone see a problem with tear gas to break up a protest over racial inequity and police brutality, but no interference in armed protests on government buildings? I don't get it. If you think you do, please enlighten me. I want to be proud to be an American... not embarrassed.
Things are starting to open back up. There were pictures of beaches on Memorial Day absolutely crammed full of people. I don't get that either. To paraphrase my husband: If people have a toothache, they go to the dentist. If they have a leaky pipe, they call a plumber. If they have termites, they call an exterminator. But God forbid that in a pandemic, we would listen to scientists?!?!?!?! When did science become political? I'm more than a little perplexed by it.
OK. Enough negative. How about some good news? We realized this week that our air-conditioner is on the outs (trust me, the good news is coming). Luckily, we noticed this before it got too hot and when we had stimulus money to help pay for it. Not how we were hoping to spend that $2400, but I'm sure glad it's there. Overall, we're feeling pretty blessed during this pandemic compared to a lot of people. I'm trying to pay it forward by being patient, following the rules, and not being too sad about summer plans falling through. I was supposed to have two more chances to play Rosie in Mamma Mia this summer, and neither one of those are going to happen. Sigh. Hopefully next year.
Hope everyone out there in cyber land is hanging in there. 💚
Wednesday, May 27, 2020
Monday, May 11, 2020
Quarantine Diary, Entry #6
A quarantine birthday has come and gone. I'm 48 years old, and who knew it would happen in chaos like this??!?! Andrew made sure I had a lovely day. I got 2 dozen roses, and he baked me a cake. My big present will be here this week sometime... I'm getting a birdbath! We have the perfect place for one in our yard, and that's what I wanted. Our yard is looking really beautiful. We got our annuals in, and everything is so green. The lilacs are fully out, and even though it's been chilly, spring is definitely here.
I've still been transferring VHS tapes to digital, and it gave me a bit of an epiphany. My mom remarried, after being single for 15 years, in 1995. She got married on May 27th of that year, and none of us knew that she'd be dead by August 18th of that same year. I transferred the VHS of her wedding and reception this week. It's a tape that I honestly avoid watching because it makes me so sad. But, this time, I watched a lot of it without getting upset at all. First time. During the reception, my mom and Mike went around to everyone in attendance and introduced them to the group. This was a lot of people! But, it was so cool to hear how that person knew my mom or Mike or both. Here's where the epiphany happens... In that room on May 27th, every person in attendance got to hear exactly how they were special to my mom. How many of us will be able to say that in the final months of our lives, we have told the people dear to us just what they meant to us and why they were important to us? What a blessing that day was for everyone in the room, and for my mom too. I guess the lesson is that we don't know when our last days will be, but maybe it's good to let those around us know that we love them and that they've influenced our lives in unique, meaningful ways.
Hang in there, everyone.
I've still been transferring VHS tapes to digital, and it gave me a bit of an epiphany. My mom remarried, after being single for 15 years, in 1995. She got married on May 27th of that year, and none of us knew that she'd be dead by August 18th of that same year. I transferred the VHS of her wedding and reception this week. It's a tape that I honestly avoid watching because it makes me so sad. But, this time, I watched a lot of it without getting upset at all. First time. During the reception, my mom and Mike went around to everyone in attendance and introduced them to the group. This was a lot of people! But, it was so cool to hear how that person knew my mom or Mike or both. Here's where the epiphany happens... In that room on May 27th, every person in attendance got to hear exactly how they were special to my mom. How many of us will be able to say that in the final months of our lives, we have told the people dear to us just what they meant to us and why they were important to us? What a blessing that day was for everyone in the room, and for my mom too. I guess the lesson is that we don't know when our last days will be, but maybe it's good to let those around us know that we love them and that they've influenced our lives in unique, meaningful ways.
Hang in there, everyone.
Tuesday, April 28, 2020
Quarantine Diary, Entry #5
It's weird to think that I've been busy, but I have felt busy during this time. Busy but rested. I've been doing things that I normally don't have time to think about doing. Yesterday, I spent all day organizing the craft room/office and unpacking boxes that hadn't been touched since I moved here in 2014 after Andrew's and my wedding!
Andrew taught me how to play chess earlier this week. I SUCK. I need way more practice. It's frustrating, but in time, I think it will be something fun and he and I can do together. Right now, I'm thinking way too much and not really enjoying it that much. But it will come. I have also wanted to play chess with the kids at school. Before I was the teacher, GOAL classes always had a chess unit, but I scrapped it because I didn't know how to play. Now, I don't have an excuse!
Today, I started transferring old VHS tapes to digital format. I found some cords that Andrew and I bought YEARS ago for this process. I wasn't sure they'd even work anymore, but they do. It's a time-consuming process, but I know it will be worth it. Today, I transferred a production of Evita and musical theatre troupe from college as well as Matt's junior high swing choir, my high school concert choir, my 16th birthday party, and my stint as mayor in a mock city council meeting for Student Government Day my junior year. Nice trips down memory lane. More movies to transfer tomorrow!
Andrew taught me how to play chess earlier this week. I SUCK. I need way more practice. It's frustrating, but in time, I think it will be something fun and he and I can do together. Right now, I'm thinking way too much and not really enjoying it that much. But it will come. I have also wanted to play chess with the kids at school. Before I was the teacher, GOAL classes always had a chess unit, but I scrapped it because I didn't know how to play. Now, I don't have an excuse!
Today, I started transferring old VHS tapes to digital format. I found some cords that Andrew and I bought YEARS ago for this process. I wasn't sure they'd even work anymore, but they do. It's a time-consuming process, but I know it will be worth it. Today, I transferred a production of Evita and musical theatre troupe from college as well as Matt's junior high swing choir, my high school concert choir, my 16th birthday party, and my stint as mayor in a mock city council meeting for Student Government Day my junior year. Nice trips down memory lane. More movies to transfer tomorrow!
Wednesday, April 8, 2020
Quarantine Diary, Entry #4
Today I had my first online class with students. I didn't really have a plan because I wasn't sure the technology was even going to work. I had blocked out 45 minutes, and we really only needed 30 for this first session. I had 14 of 18 kids show up to the class. 6 had video and audio, 7 had just audio, and 1 only had chat access, but he was able to communicate with us. It was just great to see their faces and hear their voices.
I'm starting with 45 minutes of "office hours" where kids can get immediate feedback from me if they e-mail or use Google Hangouts. Then I'm going into 45 minutes of a Zoom-like program within Canvas, our district's online learning system. Dee Ann and I tested it out last night before I went to bed, so I knew it had potential. It was really slick today. I did have two kids who couldn't get in for some reason, but I'll try to get that figured out for next time. I'm meeting with a different group every day.
The kids looked good. I think a lot of them are bored and are probably playing too many video games, but if I were that age, I'd probably be doing the same. I did have some say they'd been cooking and helping their folks on the farm getting the equipment ready for planting. Those are things that they would never have time to do during a regular school year. I hope all the kids can find activities like that during this time away from school.
Yesterday afternoon, I had a Zoom happy hour with Tracy, Suzanne, and Jeff... all my bridesmaids/men! We had a great time and laughed a lot. It was just what the doctor ordered. I stole this picture from Jeff to remember the occasion. :)
I'm starting with 45 minutes of "office hours" where kids can get immediate feedback from me if they e-mail or use Google Hangouts. Then I'm going into 45 minutes of a Zoom-like program within Canvas, our district's online learning system. Dee Ann and I tested it out last night before I went to bed, so I knew it had potential. It was really slick today. I did have two kids who couldn't get in for some reason, but I'll try to get that figured out for next time. I'm meeting with a different group every day.
The kids looked good. I think a lot of them are bored and are probably playing too many video games, but if I were that age, I'd probably be doing the same. I did have some say they'd been cooking and helping their folks on the farm getting the equipment ready for planting. Those are things that they would never have time to do during a regular school year. I hope all the kids can find activities like that during this time away from school.
Yesterday afternoon, I had a Zoom happy hour with Tracy, Suzanne, and Jeff... all my bridesmaids/men! We had a great time and laughed a lot. It was just what the doctor ordered. I stole this picture from Jeff to remember the occasion. :)
Monday, April 6, 2020
Quarantine Diary, Entry #3
Last night we had our first fire of
the year in the fire pit. It was perfect. I also got my bike out
yesterday. Andrew pumped my tires up, and I was ready to go. My butt
is definitely feeling it today, but it was great to get out for a spin.
I biked 5 miles, and it was sunny and cool. Aside from cracking my
phone when I got home, it was a really perfect afternoon.
I'm going to be asking the kids to reflect on how they feel during this time. How do I feel? I am OK most of the time, but I have had some anxiety-filled moments where I really have to talk myself down. There are times when it truly does feel like the end of days. In those moments, I go for a walk or meditate or play with the dog. I've been able to successfully talk myself down from the ledge every time so far. There are times when I feel lazy and guilty for not doing anything. Then, when I reflect, I know that I AM doing things. I also know that I need to slow down... maybe we all do. Maybe, in a way, this is the universe telling us all to slow down a little bit and appreciate what we have and who we have. I'm determined to stay positive and flexible. This virus is not something that will be changed with my impatience or with anyone's impatience, for that matter. We have to go with the flow, let previous plans go, and just try to do the best we can.
I'm going to be asking the kids to reflect on how they feel during this time. How do I feel? I am OK most of the time, but I have had some anxiety-filled moments where I really have to talk myself down. There are times when it truly does feel like the end of days. In those moments, I go for a walk or meditate or play with the dog. I've been able to successfully talk myself down from the ledge every time so far. There are times when I feel lazy and guilty for not doing anything. Then, when I reflect, I know that I AM doing things. I also know that I need to slow down... maybe we all do. Maybe, in a way, this is the universe telling us all to slow down a little bit and appreciate what we have and who we have. I'm determined to stay positive and flexible. This virus is not something that will be changed with my impatience or with anyone's impatience, for that matter. We have to go with the flow, let previous plans go, and just try to do the best we can.
Wednesday, April 1, 2020
Quarantine Diary, Entry #2
4/1
I'm definitely starting to lose track of the days. How many days of quarantine have we had? Does it even matter? :)
Today we had a staff meeting on Zoom. It was nice to see everyone's faces. The Department of Education has given some more guidelines about what we can do, so I'm anxious to get some things online for my kids and to set up some Zoom sessions for us all to see each other. I don't know if everyone has internet access (that's one of my big fears right now), but I hope to see as many as I can.
It was absolutely beautiful here today. Georgie and I went on a 3-mile walk, and it pretty much did us both in. But the day was sunny and cool. I didn't even need a sweatshirt. Things are starting to really bloom. The tulip trees were really showing their stuff today.
I cleaned my room and got the last picture on the wall today (after 5 years of living here). "My room" is where I keep most of my clothes and makeup table, etc. Grandma's old futon is in here too. It makes a really nice meditation room for Andrew and me, and it can even be an extra bedroom when needed, which it has a couple of times. The last picture to go up was my autographed picture of Julie Andrews. Now it REALLY feels like my space. :)
Andrew and I are living well. We've been eating well and watching good movies and reading. I've been trying to look at this time away from the real world and real life as a gift. It's terrible that it has to come in the form of a pandemic, but I feel like I've been taking care of myself, my home, and my marriage in a way that hasn't had my complete focus and attention. Now I can ease my students back into that picture, and it's going to be a way that's not pressured or stressful, I hope. Nothing will be required or graded, but we can have contact. I've missed the kids a lot.
I'm definitely starting to lose track of the days. How many days of quarantine have we had? Does it even matter? :)
Today we had a staff meeting on Zoom. It was nice to see everyone's faces. The Department of Education has given some more guidelines about what we can do, so I'm anxious to get some things online for my kids and to set up some Zoom sessions for us all to see each other. I don't know if everyone has internet access (that's one of my big fears right now), but I hope to see as many as I can.
It was absolutely beautiful here today. Georgie and I went on a 3-mile walk, and it pretty much did us both in. But the day was sunny and cool. I didn't even need a sweatshirt. Things are starting to really bloom. The tulip trees were really showing their stuff today.
I cleaned my room and got the last picture on the wall today (after 5 years of living here). "My room" is where I keep most of my clothes and makeup table, etc. Grandma's old futon is in here too. It makes a really nice meditation room for Andrew and me, and it can even be an extra bedroom when needed, which it has a couple of times. The last picture to go up was my autographed picture of Julie Andrews. Now it REALLY feels like my space. :)
Andrew and I are living well. We've been eating well and watching good movies and reading. I've been trying to look at this time away from the real world and real life as a gift. It's terrible that it has to come in the form of a pandemic, but I feel like I've been taking care of myself, my home, and my marriage in a way that hasn't had my complete focus and attention. Now I can ease my students back into that picture, and it's going to be a way that's not pressured or stressful, I hope. Nothing will be required or graded, but we can have contact. I've missed the kids a lot.
Tuesday, March 24, 2020
Quarantine Diary, Entry #1
So far during this quaratine, I've basically just been trying to keep my sanity. A teacher without students... it all feels pretty useless. I made a schedule for myself which was overly ambitious. I haven't stuck to it even once:
8:00: Get up, walk, shower
9:00: Meditate, then breakfast
9:30: Send cards to students
10:00: Crochet and watch TV
11:00: Read
11:30: ??? Unexpected adventure (Andrew suggested this... the truth is every day so far has been an unexpected adventure!)
12:00: Lunch
1:00: Clean garage
2:00: Find a pile for the Bargain Box
2:30: Clean something/cook or bake something
3:00: Quiet time: nap/stretch/yoga/be in nature
4:00: Blog
4:30: Read/video something for Alice
5:00: Work on vacation books
6:00: Walk with Andrew
6:30: Dinner
7:30: School work/e-mail/correspondence
8:30: Time with Andrew
9:30: Read
10:30: Lights out
Hm. Sounds great, eh? Yeah. It hasn't happened. Lots of things on the schedule HAVE happened, but rarely (if ever ) at their assigned time or every day.
But, I'm glad I have this schedule and an idea of things I want to accomplish in this unprecedented time away from work.
One thing I have discovered so far that is really weird is that I need to walk to keep sane. I've always known that I needed to walk. But I've always treated it more like a chore or something to get through. I've had one day that I didn't walk so far, and I was so depressed. I cried and felt hopeless and was so so low. I think that was The next day, I got up and walked first thing, a longer walk than I usually take. I didn't really enjoy it, but I was doing it because I knew it would make me feel better. Since then, I've walked about 3 miles a day. I know that it's going to help my state of mind. I guess before I was only walking because I knew it was good for my body. Now, during this quarantine, I've discovered that exercise is VITAL for my mind. If I'm going to make it through this mess without going crazy I've got to keep moving.
Another really fun thing I did was convince Andrew to help me make a snowman. On Sunday, we had the perfect wet, packing, snowman snow. It was one of those late winter/early spring snows that you know won't last long, so you have to make it count. I made the snowballs, and Andrew helped me put it together, and he gathered the props to decorate it too. We needed planks to roll the middle section up because it was so darned heavy! Anyway, it was a blast. And the poor thing lasted about one whole hour before it got too warm and toppled over. Ah, well. Such is the life of a March 22 snowman in Iowa!
8:00: Get up, walk, shower
9:00: Meditate, then breakfast
9:30: Send cards to students
10:00: Crochet and watch TV
11:00: Read
11:30: ??? Unexpected adventure (Andrew suggested this... the truth is every day so far has been an unexpected adventure!)
12:00: Lunch
1:00: Clean garage
2:00: Find a pile for the Bargain Box
2:30: Clean something/cook or bake something
3:00: Quiet time: nap/stretch/yoga/be in nature
4:00: Blog
4:30: Read/video something for Alice
5:00: Work on vacation books
6:00: Walk with Andrew
6:30: Dinner
7:30: School work/e-mail/correspondence
8:30: Time with Andrew
9:30: Read
10:30: Lights out
Hm. Sounds great, eh? Yeah. It hasn't happened. Lots of things on the schedule HAVE happened, but rarely (if ever ) at their assigned time or every day.
But, I'm glad I have this schedule and an idea of things I want to accomplish in this unprecedented time away from work.
One thing I have discovered so far that is really weird is that I need to walk to keep sane. I've always known that I needed to walk. But I've always treated it more like a chore or something to get through. I've had one day that I didn't walk so far, and I was so depressed. I cried and felt hopeless and was so so low. I think that was The next day, I got up and walked first thing, a longer walk than I usually take. I didn't really enjoy it, but I was doing it because I knew it would make me feel better. Since then, I've walked about 3 miles a day. I know that it's going to help my state of mind. I guess before I was only walking because I knew it was good for my body. Now, during this quarantine, I've discovered that exercise is VITAL for my mind. If I'm going to make it through this mess without going crazy I've got to keep moving.
Another really fun thing I did was convince Andrew to help me make a snowman. On Sunday, we had the perfect wet, packing, snowman snow. It was one of those late winter/early spring snows that you know won't last long, so you have to make it count. I made the snowballs, and Andrew helped me put it together, and he gathered the props to decorate it too. We needed planks to roll the middle section up because it was so darned heavy! Anyway, it was a blast. And the poor thing lasted about one whole hour before it got too warm and toppled over. Ah, well. Such is the life of a March 22 snowman in Iowa!
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